On my mind

Came across this on the internet. It didn't have an author written on it. But as the one thing currently taking up most space in my mind is the future, and what to do with it, this really spoke to me.

Future? 
Such an interesting concept
Ideas and plans
Already laid out in front of you
But a future…
It's more than just an idea
It's every possibility
Every chance
For something altering to occur
A future is neither bad
Nor good
A future is neutral
Caring not of its effects
Such a future comes
From a biased past
One filled with truth
With lies, with alibis
Crossed with emotions
And actions
This past turns into now
A now riddled with uncertainty
And decisions
Full of memories
And hopes, dreams
Once now turns into then
That's when things turn grey
Who knows
Which path you will choose? 
Which wine you will taste? 
Whose heart will break? 
The one thing about futures
Is that you have to live now
To ever reach them
In an instant, your future
Can disappear
Your now becomes past
And nothing follows
This future
Is only reached
By living through today
Through the memories
Of futures passed
And the choices made tomorrow
The future is far away
A concept hard to grasp
But we'll grasp the future yet
And live it to the last 

It's taken from here.

The sun has set

Trying to put words to my thoughts.
There's been many of them lately.
Loneliness. Without knowing why.
Confusion. Not knowing what's happening.
Fear. Of the unknown that is approaching.
Longing. There's something missing.

I look in the mirror, and see a set of grey eyes.
They're looking at me, questioning, wondering.
Doubting all that is me, all that I know.
As if saying, what are you doing with yourself?
Why and for whom?

I guess the question is:
Will it be worth it?

Farewell insecurity - for tonight

And I decided to ignore it. Because no matter how much I want to know what to do with my life, there's not much I can do about it right now.

And as I thought about it, I realised that I do know. Atleast for another couple of years. And does anyone really know what they'll be doing in a couple of years time?

And as I let go, a weight lifted from shoulders and I could stretch my back out again.
If only you knew how long ago it is I could stretch my back.

I fell asleep with a smile.
And the calm knowledge of atleast knowing what I'll be doing the coming years.

Staring into the future

I am sitting staring into my future. Not really knowing what I'm looking at. It's blurry, and kind of dark. I've always known what I want to do. It has changed a lot over the years, but I've always known. Now I am becoming unsecure. I am staring into my options, and I don't know. I just don't know.

It was all under control. I knew where I was going.
Then a voice entered my head. Those stupid voices.
And suddenly, it's not so clear anymore.

I just wish it could be easy.
But I don't think that will ever happen....

It's going so fast

The road stretches out in front of her.
It seems to never end.
When it finally seems to be over, a turn is made, and there is a new long stretch of emptiness.

Insecurity.
Fear.
Future?

The car is going faster.
Can't find the break.
Want to get out.
Now.

Stress.
Breathelss.
Future.