Warm me up

Is this how it's supposed to be?
I'm sick of it.

The dragon, #3

Paul suddenly woke up, he wondered where he were.
Then he remembered what had happened, and he peeked out from the clothes.
He heard a loud noise, he looked around.
All other piles of clothes were gone, except the one he was hiding in.
He saw them in a weird machine that was spinning them around.
He jumped up and ran away from the clothes,
he did not want to end up in the scary machine.

He hadn't paid attention to where he was going when he ran away from the scary thing.
Now he looked around and realised he has entered a new world.
And as he looked around this strange new place, he saw something he had never seen before.

He was face to face with another creature that looked just like him!

Like a child

Do you remember when you were a child,
I know, it's hard to do sometimes.
But think back. And remember that feeling,
the feeling of pulling away your curtains in the morning.
And finding a new world.

It was as if someone had covered the world with cotton,
or even better, cotton candy.
The grey, boring walks to school turned into an adventure.
There were snowmen greeting you,
and angels lying on the ground.

Do you remember the joy of jumping around?
Do you remember the laughter after a sleigh ride?
That cold, numb feeling after a night in the hill,
and coming home to a mug of hot chocolate.
It's like a distant dream.

Imagine getting to relive those feelings.
Once a year, I try to.
It's wonderful, it's calming.
It destresses you, it lets you relax.
It's magic.
At its very best.
It turns you into the child you once were, if only for a day.


(Photo taken by myself on a recent visit to Winter Wonderland)

Fact

The more I stay away,
the more I realise this is my home.

Snow

I sit and look out my window.
A blanket is falling down from the sky.
It's white, and soft, and beautiful.
Once I used to look at it with disgust,
cursing it's existence over and over again.
Now, I cannot help but smile.
And welcome it with open arms.
Everything gets softer, quieter, calmer.
What once was dark, is now light.
What once was grey, is now white.
It's magic.

Serenity

And for once,
she stopped worrying and let the emotions come.
And she smiled.
And all was right with the world.

Star night

The air was cold.
The sky was clear.
The stars were looking down on us.
And if only for a minute all our worries seemed to disappear.






(Photo from ajjlaa.blogg.se, Thank you)

Facts

When you're faced with the world at its worst,
not even the area under a desk is a good hiding place.

The dragon, #2

One day when Paul was hard asleep in his laundry basket something that had never happened before happened.

The basket was knocked over. It fell down, and out with it fell Paul.

He woke up with a thud, not knowing what had happened. It felt very strange, because under his feet there was not the normal softness of the laundry basket, but something hard and cold. It had a strange colour as well. He looked around, and was shocked. His world had always been the laundry basket, suddenly it had grown to a size that he could not comprehend. He looked around again, trying to find a place that looked like home. In a corner he saw a pile of something that looked an awful lot like his laundry basket. It was a pile of clothes. He quickly ran over and buried himself. He did not want to look around, he did not want to see what was surrounding him, he just wanted his home back.

This new, big world was frightening. He wanted the familiarity and safety of his laundry basket back. He rolled up at the bottom of the pile furthest in the corner. Sobbing he cried himself to sleep in this new, scary world.

Time for bed

It's time to switch off the light.
To close the tired eyes, and let go.
Stop the thoughts from flowing,
allow the dreams to take over.
Hide from the world,
if only for a few hours.
Switch off the light.
This is what's been longed for all day.
Nightfall. Sleep. Escape.
Close your eyes, it's easier said than done.
Thoughts rushing through your head.
Want to sleep.
Don't want tomorrow to come.
Fighting the inner demons,
in an attempt to win.
Will fall asleep.
But too late.
Will wake up.
Too tired.

And so a new day begins.
And the cycle continues.

Homesick

You don't know how lucky you are.
You who can go home whenever you want to.
You who, if it becomes too much, can be home within a few hours.

I chose this.
This is my life.
But it doesn't make it any easier.

And it always strikes.
And it gets you bad.
And it makes you feel tiny.

I want to go home.
Now.
But I can't.
And it makes me very sad.

Fact of life

With too many thoughts to be able to say anything of my own I'm using someone else's words...
(http://stuffnoonetoldme.blogspot.com/)

The sun has set

Trying to put words to my thoughts.
There's been many of them lately.
Loneliness. Without knowing why.
Confusion. Not knowing what's happening.
Fear. Of the unknown that is approaching.
Longing. There's something missing.

I look in the mirror, and see a set of grey eyes.
They're looking at me, questioning, wondering.
Doubting all that is me, all that I know.
As if saying, what are you doing with yourself?
Why and for whom?

I guess the question is:
Will it be worth it?

Need a break

A used up milk carton.
A loud noise.
A phone call.
An incomplete essay.

It all builds up.
And eventually it all bursts.

Shaking.
Tears.
Into a corner.
Hiding.

Sometimes the world is too much.

All Saints Day

Light a candle for someone you miss.
This is the day when we remember you.
We laugh at the jokes you once told,
and smile at the memories you gave us.

Light a candle for someone you love.
It will scatter the darkenss.
We close our eyes and see you in our minds,
and in our hearts we embrace you.

Light a candle today, it's that time of year.


(Photo by Ian Britton)

Utopia - yeah right

A place where everyone has enough.
Where no one is on the outskirts.
Where no one walks hungry.
Where everyones is heard.
Where everyone has shelter.

It doesn't have to be constant happiness.
Never ending sunshine.
Milk and cookies every day.
Fulfilling activities.
All smiles and laughter.

Somewhere where no one is afraid.
Where everyone is welcome.
Where there is no hyperventilation.
Where no one is hunted for their beliefs.
Where everyone can be the person they want to be.

If that could be possible.
A world where there is no suffering.
If that could be possible by me giving something up.
By you giving something up.
By us all giving something up.
Would you?

Would you give up your car for the sake of people having food?
Would you give up your summer vacation for the sake of people having shelter?
Would you give up your high-end shopping for the sake of people not being persecuted?
I would.

University

Sitting in bed, should move to the desk.
Looking out the window, should open my books.
Typing this, should write an essay.

Deadlines.
Right around the corner.
Cannot forumlate thoughts,
need 3000 words.

Essays.
Frustration.

I miss you

So I went to sleep, with the wish of seeing you in my dreams.
I see your smile and hear your voice.
I hide in your arms and never want to let go.
It feels safe, and comforting.

I never want to wake up.

When I'm awake all I have is your photo.
I dreamingly look at it, thinking of what could have been.
Thinking of the laughs and the journeys.
It makes me sad, we will never have that again.

I want to go back to sleep.

I turn back time in my sleeping state.
Return to a life when we weren't seperated.
We don't take it for granted, because I know I will have to wake up.
When the alarm goes off I curse my life as you disappear in front of my eyes.

Sometimes it's just not fair.

Facts

The leaves are slowly dying and falling to the ground.
I am determined to not join them.